I had a bit of a meltdown the night before he started. This person has been attached to me every single day (except for 4!) for the past 17 months. It was going to be an adjustment for him AND me. I was also feeling a guilty because I was really looking forward to having some time to myself. (Side note: What is it about being a mom that make you feel guilty AT LEAST once a day?!) I kept beating myself down by having the internal argument "You're a stay at home mom, this is your JOB!" "You're a bad Mom, buck up!" "You are being selfish for needing (wanting) time for yourself."
Now that "school" has started and he seems to be doing good, I am getting better at telling that nasty part of myself to shut the hell up!
He has been doing great, except for a few tears at drop off time. The teachers have said that he is doing really well with the other kids (thanks goodness! He has been having some problems with hitting) and he seems to be enjoying himself and when we left the class today he looked back at a little boy, waved and said "bye bye".
When I walked in today, he was busy playing so he didn't see me and when I finally got his attention he gave me the most wonderful, heart-melting greeting I have EVER received in my life. His eyes instantly lit up, a huge smile graced his beautiful face, he jumped up and cried "Mama!" He jumped into my lap, gave me a big, lingering hug and then gave me a kiss. He just kept looking a me like I wasn't real and he was so happy to be in my arms. I almost burst out crying right there on the floor. One of my happiest mommy moments!
He is such a handsome little man! Good for you for knowing that sometimes as moms one of the best things we can do to be a better wife and mother is to take care of ourselves....and that involves time to yourself! Just think of how much more focused your can be when he is now home if you are able to get done the things you need to get done while he is gone. And don't forget that sometimes....you don't have to get the entire house cleaned while he is gone. Take sometime to do some of your favorite things for you (oh how I long for the days when I could get out of bed lazily, sit in my pjs, and watch a chick flick...I hardly ever have time to watch anything anymore! You are a good mom Linds! I also must admit that if I wasn't ever gone, I wouldn't get to enjoy those same hugs and kisses you described above. I love those and I really do think absence makes the heart grow fonder! Hope you are enjoying your new place! You should post pics of the inside soon. I'd love to see it!
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